What is really important?

But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look at his appearance or at his physical stature, because I have refused him. For the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” – 1 Samuel 16:7

There are several things that people find attractive and each of us has a reason for finding that trait appealing.  I have made an incomplete list

Pretty eyes: Window to the soul

Large Chest (male): Protection and strength

Nice hair: Run your fingers through it

Submissive: Needing someone to follow

Saver: Someone who saves money, security

Decisive: Ability to make good decisions quickly and thoroughly

Needy: Some people need someone to rely on them

Clean: Some people need to have the other person overly clean

Large Bank Account: security

Smile: Friendly appearance 

Athletic: Healthy

Smart: Intellect and typically a job

Dominant: Someone to take charge of the family

Wise: Makes good decisions

Spender: Fellow shopper

Witty: Good intellect and the ability to convey it

Funny: Make a person laugh is good medicine

Nice: Gives the benefit of doubt instead of jumping to conclusions, doesn't say mean things

Easy going: Generally good natured and is an optimist

Self-reliant: Very little need from the other partner

Neat: Tidy and organized

That’s a good enough list, and I can tell you that some of those went to the top of my list and some of those are a total turn off. But what I realize now as I look over the list I made when looking for a spouse was what was missing. The one trait that is missing is “Loves God” as it says in Proverbs 31:30 “Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” That verse can be applied to either gender. 

People should have a list of traits they would like in a spouse, because Marriage is forever. However, at the top of that list should be part of the greatest commandment which is found in Matthew 22:36-37, "‘Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?’ Jesus replied: ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’" If they love the Lord with all their heart, soul and mind, then most of those other traits will fall into place. 

And if they love God more than they love you, then divorce will not be in their vocabulary.

Lord, thank You for taking my list and without me realizing it, putting a woman that loves You into my life.  Thank You for the many blessings that I enjoy. Lord let me do your work, and help guide me in my journey to become more like You. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.